best comic strip ever made.
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<3

summer street

jesus christ i was so happy today while driving on the skyway with a different, more reliable vehicle even with the knowledge that i could, potentially, fly right off the edge of that skyway and DIE. but i was not even SCARED of that thought as much as i am about what people say about me behind my back, or who at the credit card company laughs the hardest when they see my credit score, or what's coming in the mail from some long-lost roommate, or if i have pink eye, or WHAT THE FUCK GAS IS FOUR DOLLARS A GALLON AND I NEED ELEVEN GALLONS THAT IS ONE QUARTER OF MY CURRENT PAYCHECK, or you or her or him or them.

ok thank you, world. the chill left and now it's nothing but sweat and sunshine and prospective tans (who am i kidding...i do not tan).
i would like a bicycle. why did you throw out my bike? i called you and called you and myspace messaged you and you still threw out my bike. it even had that little hamburger bell and it was a SCHWINN, a natalie-green schwinn! you threw it away and now i have no bike, and even if i DO live in lovejoy, i would still throughly enjoy riding it all over downtown with friends...that way, i wouldnt have to listen to my muffler scar my eardrums or subject people to the strange things growing on the floor of my car.

(hey everyone! i have nasal polyps http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nasal_polyps and a deviated septum http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deviated_septum !!!!!!

surgery is inevitable, so i guess i didn't really need my bike right away. it's just that i never got over it; the throwing away of the (my) bike.

oh

when will this goddamned CHILL leave already?
i've been getting hundreds that i don't really expect and it's complicated because i'm not entirely sure i deserve them but who am i to question the highly-educated educators?
i suppose i DO have nice hands; thank you
the rest of you have a choice of seeking absolution or risking never holding a place again.

my thoughts on Episode 9 of Season 4 of the Office

I REVOKE ALL STATEMENTS I MADE CONCERNING EPISODE NINE OF THE FOURTH SEASON OF THE OFFICE UPON CAREFUL CONSIDERATION CONSIDERING IT WAS A REALLY GOOD EPISODE CHOCK FULL OF WELL DONE EVIL LOOKS AND PAINFUL SITUATIONS.

if people heard the things i say to my cats...

your past is just parts of your live that you will never, ever get back.
what if, you are absolutely certain, after arduous internal battles, that what once was actually was perfect?
you cannot remember being unhappy, at least not beyond the superficial.

what then? or now, should i say?

mystery dancing

around age 14, nearing my last legs of dance class (no pun intended)
i was in a tap dance, of which i have no memory.
there is a photo, and in said photo, i am wearing a one-piece, short sleeve/shorts thing, with an empire waistline that was red on top and black below. the black part had red piping down the center and around the leg of the shorts. there were little black gloves with red lace, and a bowler hat with red ribbon.

im smiling in this photo, balancing on one leg. right foot touching my left knee. perfect dance posture as im holding the rim of my bowler hat with my right hand. smiling. i have no idea what this dance was. i dont remember ever performing in this costume, or what song went along with it.

i really believe this picture is fake. nobody else around me remembers this dance. not even donna scott herself.